I´m going to spend, spend, spend my Crypto billions – By Jon Bennion-Pedley

Just like Viv Nicholson who won the football pools in 1961 I am going to “spend, spend, spend”. The amount of conspicuous consumption that I will sicken myself with when I become a crypto-billionaire will make Viv spin in her Wakefield grave and Liberace talk about showing a little reserve. I am soon to be in the money. Probably.

I am now officially an owner of Crypto-currency. After 9 days of faffing around getting a Crypto-currency trading account – a cumbersome and clunky process that frustrated me immensely – I deposited $2300 and made my purchase. I have a crypto-wallet, a trading interface, and I watch my “position” several times a day. As the graphs flicker, the trades go red, green, grey then red again, the prices fluctuate (wildly this week) and the markets do their thing…..it is like a little bit of Wall Street has come to sub Saharan Africa. Greed is good. Lunch is for wimps. Fortune favours the brave.

On the day of my triumphal entry into the Crypto world……the digital currency markets crashed. Bitcoin lost 40% of its value, Dogecoin lost 30% of its worth and China made Crypto speculation illegal. Some bloke named after a particularly cheap aftershave said he wouldn´t exchange his electric cars for Bitcoin which didn´t help either. Being incredibly wise I have invested in a coin called Cardano. For no other reason than that one of my friends who does actually understand Crypto told me to. As it stands, 72 hours into my digi-adventure, my $2300 investment is worth a whopping $2350. The sky is definitely the limit.

My crypto investment is wildly speculative. There is a fighting chance that in a year´s time my $2300 will be $23,000. There is probably a much higher chance that it could be $230. I rarely agree with anything the FCA say but on this occasion I do. “Don´t invest in Crypto-currency unless you can afford to lose your investment completely”. I can, I wholly expect to, and I am enjoying watching my graphs and red/green lights. Go and do likewise – if it´s just for fun. That is what portfolio diversification looks like.

Otherwise stay well clear.